Its members, its history and its figures
“Kids die for free!”
Roster as of 7 Nov 2026 · 17 hours ago
When you want somebody gone
And you don't want to wait too long
Call the Immediate Murder Professionals
Hand grenade or cyanide
We'll make it look like suicide
The Immediate Murder Professionals
We do our jobs so well
Because we come straight up from hell
We'll kill your husband or your wife
We'll even let you keep the knife
We're the Immediate Murder Professionals
Commander
Executive Officer
| # | Last 30 days | ||||||||||
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 1 | Commander | 1,899 | 53.88% | 32,624 | 43 | 1,451 | 53.49% | 12 days ago | 1,316 d | today | |
| 2 | Executive Officer | — | 55.00% | 100 | — | — | — | 11 years ago | 1,735 d | today | |
The figures are the ones stored for each member, as of the time in the Stats column; a dash means a figure is not known here.
The last 30 days are summed from the sessions the site recorded for each member; a dash where it recorded none in 60 days.